Take the deejay off the mike

Truly, radio disc jockeys are the vestigal organ in the body of popular entertainment. They may have served a purpose in the distant past, but today, they are little more than a nuisense... yet another obstacle in that desperate search for your favorite song. Radio deejays are responsible for the sales of more iPods than Napster, Morpheus, and Grokster combined.

If you need concrete evidence of the radio deejay's complete worthlessness, you need look no further than the station in my hometown. The evening deejay started an empty-headed rant on Arabs, describing a recent conversation in which he referred to Middle-Easterners as "towel heads."

He apologized shortly afterward, but only as the set-up for an incredibly labored joke. He explained that the headdresses worn by most Arabs were actually sheets, and that (can you see this coming from a mile away?) this technically made them "little sheet-heads." Oh humor, whereart thou?

Tasteless jokes have their place, but only in the hands of talented comedians. Unfortunately, "talent" is a foreign word to the common radio disc jockey. His delivery of the joke was sluggish and awkward, and the punchline was telegraphed so far in advance that it took him ten seconds to catch up with it.

The climate between Westerners and Arabs has become increasingly hostile, with violence erupting from both sides at the drop of a hat. This could result in the disc jockey being fired from the radio station for his insensitive comments... but the truly tragic thing is that he'll just be replaced with another one.

Why, oh why, can't radio stations just say "no" to deejays and just play what the listener wants to hear... music? Advertisements are an unfortunate necessity for broadcast radio, but in the 21st century, absolutely nobody needs, or wants, on-air "personalities"... especially not this schmuck.

JR